It will be two years since I have finished my teaching credential program and I'm not the angry frustrated sub that started this blog, but rather a man stuck in career limbo, with a side job as a sub. This blog is of course a time to reflect on the past couple of years, but what got me here was a very simple question; " Mr. C do you remember my name?!"
When I started this blog I was pretty wound up, for a number of factors; I was dealing planter fasciitis, which of course was misdiagnosed by an incompetent doctor. My initial diagnosis was arthritis, which lead me to see a rheumatologist, who in turn put me in debt just to tell me I had no inflammatory diseases. I had just come off of close to a year of an average of 4 hours of sleep. I certainly was not ready for an interview, my health was deplorable after months of fast food microwave pizzas and no exercise. To top it off I had broken it off with my girlfriend at the time, under duress? I was not stressed, I -was- stress. I embodied what it meant to be stressed out, this manifested itself physically and mentally and though some have said that I kept a cool exterior, inside I was riddled with depression and anxiety.
At the very least I'm hoping my musings were amusing, it was a good start to a very long recovery process. This process has also included flying (plug plug!), numerous shoe insoles, of which I think I have found some effective ones, and though my eating habits are not immaculate I have ventured through some much better eating habits over the last couple of years. All in all I feel better than I have in two years! Looking back there was a time where I could barely walk, let alone play basketball, as I did today. It makes me optimistic that I will some day return to some great past times; Aikido, rock climbing, Airsoft, etc.
The other day while at the high school I came across one the students from my student teaching class, and she simply asked me "Hey Mr. C! Do you remember my name?" To be honest I had to look at the roll sheet to remember, but it just struck me as to how such a simple request can have such an impact on your future relationship with your students. It also struck me that this simple inquiry said so much about how the students need some kind of individuality, they want to stand out in the crowd, even if it is just to a lowly student teacher like myself. High school is so full of emotions, fears and hormones that it's easy to forget that teachers are there to kind of mitigate all this chaos and students are always seeking out those teachers who can accomplish this job the best and give them some kind of direction within the fog.
I really enjoyed my student teaching, I made mistakes, the kids made mistakes, but we all accomplished what we were there for; The kids learned history from me and I learned more about teaching than I can ever express. I have certainly been disenchanted with the profession since because; I have not gotten a single interview, I still have some nightmare classes and the prospect of more stress, lots more work from my class and BTSA is a little unsettling. To top it all off I am so far removed from my training and making lesson plans the first 3 years would be relearning and settling in, but I suppose that would be the start of just about any career. On the other hand I still hold that if given the opportunity I would accept my own class. Having my own class is what really made teaching for me, I loved my kids and it always brings a smile to my face when I do see them.
I'm not sure if I will ever be a full time secondary school teacher, but I will remember this very important lesson my students have taught me lately, just remember their name, it really does mean that much to them.
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